Theme:  Experiencing Healthy Intimacy

Thursday

8:30 AM - Parent Breakfast (CALO Conference Room)

     Please join us for a hot breakfast in the conference room with other parents as we discuss the retreat

9:00 AM - Parent Seminar – Landon (CALO Conference Room)

     Persogenics: recognizing, appreciating, & embracing differences

10:15 AM – CALO Staff & Students Depart  

Caleb, coaches and students leave CALO for Windermere in CALO bus

10:30 AM – Pack, Gather and Load  

 Parents, clinical, & leadership staff load gear in vans and personal vehicles

10:45 AM – Travel to Windermere

11:45 AM – Arrival & Briefing

   Briefing in the multi-purpose building

12:15 PM – Check-In

   Families check-in to lodging units

12:45 PM – Lunch

1:15 PM – Therapy Activity

2:45 PM – Family Time

5:30 PM – Dinner

6:45 PM – Parent Support Groups

   6:45 PM – Student Activity

8:00 PM – Campfire

9:30 PM – Family Time

   Families together inside lodging units

10:00 PM – Lights Out

Friday

7:30 AM – Breakfast

8:15 AM – Briefing

8:45 AM – Family Therapeutic Activities

1:00PM – Check-Out

1:30PM – Lunch

2:00PM – Slide Show, Feedback, End

2:45PM – Load Up 

Parents, students and coaches on bus and personal vehicles

3:15 PM – Departure

Parents and students not returning to CALO leave Windermere

CALO bus leaves with students, staff and parents returning to CALO

 Lodging Information

Family Lodging Unit

• 3 beds in each unit (1 full size mattress and 2 bunk beds)
• Running water
• Restrooms
• Showers
• Electrical outlets
• All guests must provide their own linens—sheets, pillows, blanket, sleeping bag, etc.

Clothing/Gear List

• Hat/Beanie
• Sweatshirt
• Rain jacket
• T-shirts
• Shorts
• Socks/Shoes
• Sandals
• Underwear
• Long pants
• Sunscreen
• Insect repellant
• Lip balm
• Toiletries
• Flashlight
• Wet wipes
• Hand sanitizer
• Appropriate Swimsuit
  • Women—conservative one piece
  • Men—conservative
• Towels
  
  • Bath
    
  • Face
  • Water activity
• Bedding
  • Pillow
  • Sleeping bag and/or sheets/blankets
• Sleeping attire
• Camera (confidentiality restrictions)
  • Only pictures of your student and/or staff (no other pictures of students)
    
• No pocket knives
  
• No weapons, fireworks, matches, etc.

With summer in full swing CALO students are spending quite a bit of time on the water.  It has been a refreshing and fun change up in the recreational therapy curriculum to focus on communication while having fun behind the boats. 

By now most students have passed off their entire swim test and are working very hard to pass off each step of their water skiing test. This is not an easy test.  Each student has to complete the following tasks:

Having completed each one of these difficult tasks our students will then have the opportunity to choose their next area of expertise which may include wakeboarding, knee boarding or wake skating. 

There is a phrase that we use quite regularly here at CALO, “Every moment is a therapeutic opportunity.”  There have certainly been many therapeutic opportunities while teaching the students to ski.  Recently one of our female students who had never successfully skied before went out on the boat and refused to try skiing.  As she put it, “I am afraid of failing, and I don’t want to fail in front of all my peers.”  With some gentle encouragement and a lot of support from her friends she finally took the risk of getting out of her comfort zone.  She got up and passed off her one minute ride on her third pull. 

It is not uncommon for this type of success to become contagious and enter other areas in our student’s lives including academics, canine therapy and family relationships.  The arena is different, although the principles are the same.  Calculated risks taken under the supervision of trusted adults create opportunities for increased self concept and confidence.

Rob posted a few weeks ago on this blog about our parent retreat. Since that post we have had some very nice comments from parents, students, and staff who attended. I thought it might be nice to hear directly from one parent about her experience at the retreat. I was struck in reading her email by how alone parents can feel when dealing with a significantly emotionally challenged teen. The retreat helped many parents and students recognize similarities and also helped to end some of the isolation they have felt. Here is the unedited letter from the attending parent:

"My husband and I both attended the CALO parent retreat and found it to be extremely helpful.  Our situation was a bit odd: our daughter had only been at CALO for 6 weeks when the retreat happened and she refused to go on the retreat with us.  We initially felt awkward being the only parents whose child chose not to attend, but we also felt strongly that there would be a lot to learn at the retreat and it would be a great opportunity to meet the other girls in the program as well as their parents.  We found this to be the right choice on all counts.

The staff were amazing and we learned a great deal from them. They gave seminars, but they also taught us important things with the activities they had designed.  The activities were all designed to build trust and closeness and it really worked!  We enjoyed the adults and teenagers on our team very much.  And although we were sad not to have our daughter with us it did give us a chance to watch other families try to handle the same problems we have had with our daughter.  The similarities between their stories and ours were both startling and very encouraging.

As the parents of children with attachment disorders we had all tried everything we could think of...we had read parenting books and tried lots of different parenting strategies and in spite of all our efforts our children were in treatment. During meals at the retreat we discussed these things with the other parents and it was heartwarming to hear different versions of the same stories.  So many of us feel isolated and confused and in many cases harshly judged by friends, neighbors and even family who generally see our children at their best and cannot imagine why that charming child would behave so badly for us. What in the world are we doing wrong?  We left the retreat feeling as encouraged as we had been in a long time.  The other parents were encouraging, the staff were encouraging and really, the other teens were encouraging talking about their own issues and improvements and their hopes for our daughter.  We are so glad we went and look forward to another retreat- hopefully one that our daughter attends!"

One of the amazing benefits of the CALO program is the picturesque lakeside setting. Our setting offers our students and their families a soothing, peaceful and yet engaging environment for growth and healing to occur. 

Lake Ozark, Missouri is located on the shores of Lake of the Ozarks in south central Missouri. The Lake of the Ozarks measures more than ninety miles in length and has several tributaries supplying it. In total, it has over 1,100 miles of shoreline in four different Missouri counties. The massive body of water backed up behind Bagnell Dam is the largest manmade lake in the Midwestern United States and is a popular vacation spot for residents from all parts of the country. The area contains more than 200 lakeside resorts, hotels, motels and camp grounds. 

There are two state parks in the Lake Ozark area:  Lake of the Ozarks State Park is the Largest State Park in the state of Missouri with about 17,000 acres and Ha Ha Tonka State Park is the newest State Park in Missouri purchased in 1978. It comprises about 2,400 acres on the Niagua Arm of Lake of the Ozarks.

CALO’s facility is located on fifteen acres with 700ft of waterfront. CALO utilizes the natural beauty of our surroundings to enhance and grow our recreation therapy program through wakeboarding, water skiing, fly fishing, canoeing, swimming, camping, rope course activities, climbing and bouldering.  Our students have also created a walking trail for our golden retrievers as well as participating in a variety of service projects on campus designed to help students connect with nature. One upcoming project that our students are excited about is creating a canine obstacle course for canine training.  Please feel free to peruse our website for pictures of our students enjoying our location, location, location….

CALO doesn’t enroll students into our program, we enroll families. The family is an integral part of the treatment and healing process for all our students. As the primary attachment figures our parents/guardians play an active role in the treatment team and their child’s progress. At CALO, we strongly encourage our families to be on our campus at least every 6-8 weeks (more if possible and clinically appropriate) for individual family coaching visits. During these visits, as well as during family therapy sessions, family relationships and parenting are directly coached. Families are interactive in our milieu and participate in many of our experiential activities such as recreation therapy and canine training/therapy. Our leadership team, our therapists and our residential coaches are all part of this process. Attachment parenting is modeled and parents are directly coached on how to utilize and implement therapeutic touch, coaching and rhythm control in the home as it is utilized within the CALO program. Our campus is open to our families during “family time” and we invite our families to participate in their child’s treatment and healing process.

Family time is from 9:30 AM to 6:30 PM Monday thru Saturday and Sunday from 11:00 AM to 4:00 PM. Families are welcomed and encouraged to be on campus during these times. These times are set in such a way that we respect our students’ privacy in the morning hours as they are preparing for their day and in the evening hours as they are settling down and preparing for bed. The clinical staff and support staff at CALO are prepared to offer assistance to parents during these times.

As you consider placement for your child consider the active role you will play in this process. At CALO, playing an active role is an expectation of all of our families.

For months our students have been talking about the growth zone during recreational therapy.  The growth zone is an uncomfortable, progress inspiring place just outside the comfort zone, and right before the danger zone.  Students have had the privilege to feel the growth zone during physical activities such as the mile run.  As they race around the track trying to beat their best time it is tempting to stop once your lungs start burning and your legs get tired.  The truth is that if you don’t push through that discomfort, you will never build the physical tolerance needed to improve. 

Sometimes growth hurts a little bit, and that is a good thing.  Therapy follows a similar pattern.  It is comfortable to sit in an office with your therapist and talk about superficial topics that require little vulnerability.  Unfortunately this will never help you come to a greater understanding of who you are, and what you are worth.  The process of trusting another human being with your sincerest fears and opinions can be quite terrifying.  It hurts to take that kind of emotional risk.  Again, the wonderful truth is that if you will push through that discomfort and take those emotion risks with safe individuals, you will build the emotional tolerance to improve and increase your own self worth.

We are very excited to announce the upcoming parent retreat on May 13^th – 14^th.  During this retreat families will have opportunities to explore their own growth zones and discover opportunities to strengthen and build relationships through experiential therapy.  We invite all parents of current students to plan on attending our first ever parent retreat and experience the increased intimacy within a family that comes from spending time and working together.  We hope to accomplish great things during this two day retreat and look forward to seeing you there.

In late January, the CALO leadership and clinical staff had the amazing opportunity to attend the annual NATSAP (National Association of Therapeutic Schools and Programs) conference in La Jolla, California. The conference was held in a breathtaking setting at the Hilton, La Jolla Torrey Pines. From the serene blue of the ocean waves to the deep green of the grass the setting was more that an amazing especially considering the CALO staff had left behind the coldest winter in several years back in Missouri. The conference is a dynamic coming together of a variety of talented professionals in the industry. CALO’s focus in attending the conference was on enhancing coordination, communication and collaboration with other industry professionals and to learn what tools, skills, and treatment philosophies are working with other industry professionals. The conference was a great experience and allowed our staff members to connect with others who genuinely care about helping families to heal and grow. 

NATSAP as an organization values research and evaluation as a cornerstone of effective programming and advocacy as does CALO. NATSAP is committed to helping programs like CALO to access pertinent research information and to engage in the evaluation of their own programs. In this effort, NATSAP utilizes a standing research committee, publishes the Journal of Therapeutic Schools and Programs, and manages the NATSAP Research and Evaluation Network of which CALO is an active participant. CALO families participate in this research study following their students’ enrollment. The research program allows CALO to track treatment outcomes

Our staff feels privileged to apart of such a genuine, caring and intelligent group of programs and individuals striving to guide and support families through the healing process.

Every once in a while I will hear something that probably seems obvious or unimportant to most, but it speaks to me on a very intense and personal level.  I recently had this experience during a staff meeting as our CEO was taking about the growth of CALO.  As he was talking he mentioned that a company is either growing or it is dying.  That concept struck me quite profoundly.  Grow or die.  It seems a little intense and even melodramatic, and at the same time makes so much sense.  With that concept on my mind I decided to do some soul searching of my own and looked for areas in my life that were too comfortable, areas where I had room for growth.  This has been a difficult and rewarding process for me.

Our students at CALO are being encouraged to go through a similar process in recreational therapy.  We recognize that most students are here at CALO because they spend too much time in either their comfort zone or the danger zone.  One important concept they will be encouraged to internalize and benefit from is this: Progress only happens in the growth zone.  They will experience this as they learn to set goals and work towards achieving them. 

CALO students are currently training and preparing to go on a 100 mile bike ride.  This will take place at the end of March.  Students will pack their camping gear and hit the Katy Trail with their own personal goals to cover 100 miles in three days.  In preparation for this great accomplishment students are running, biking and swimming to get their bodies in shape and ready for the vigorous workout they will soon complete. It has been a great experience already to watch these talented youth exceed their own expectations in training as they set goals, disrupt their comfort zones and learn added self worth as they do things they didn’t think were possible.

With apologies to MD's everywhere I would like to give a very short lesson on the brain and its development. I am hopeful that a short synopsis of some of what we know about the brain will then help us understand some of what can positively impact the brain in later, teenage life. So here goes:

The brain can be subdivided into three regions--the hindbrain, the midbrain, and the forebrain. The hindbrain is where autonomic bodily control is regulated. Food consumption, hunger, digestion, food search, breathing, various senses, etc. are regulated and controlled here. In general, the feeling of "I need, I will go get what I need" for physical well being comes from this area of the brain. The midbrain is where relationships with others are felt and where physical proximity is interpreted as good or bad. Touch with emotional meaning is interpreted here. To some extent, love is felt here. The forebrain is where cognition is accomplished. It is the part of the brain that uses rational argument, that formulates sentences, that writes in this blog and uses logic. It is the part of the brain that allows us to think about our existence in existential terms.

Various activities and life events operate more substantially on just one of these three regions of the brain at any given time. During early formative years, keeping a child away from food would activate his/her hindbrain and keep the child in a survival mode in ways that would adversely affect brain development. In ways, the child would become partly stuck in base survival activities. S/he might hoard food. S/he might run away and try to survive on his/her own. Another child who is given food, shelter, and water, but who is abused sexually from birth to pre-adolescence might then learn that sex is to be used in relationships to get what s/he wants. S/he might be promiscuous. S/he might always look through a lens of who has the power in any given situation and then try to align with the power players in the environment. Or s/he might try to always maintain the power position by intimidation and manipulation. That would be what s/he has learned from abuse and control.

The teens we work with at CALO come from situations where the hindbrain and midbrain were developing in abusive or neglectful situations. More...

Two months ago CALO students were given the challenge to do something difficult; to be totally selfless and invested in the well being of someone in need. Throughout the holiday season they spent their recreational therapy time planning different activities to benefit people in need.

 After much discussion our girls decided to sponsor 15 children without families at the Evangelical Children’s Home (ECH) in St. Louis.  They chose to work with these children because of the similar pasts they shared and the connection they felt.  They could relate to some of the feelings and emotions that accompanied their circumstances.  Through the organizational efforts of numerous service projects, and with the support of many families, friends and community members, our girls raised enough money to purchase 15 duffel bags and fill each one of them with gifts, clothing, treats and supplies to bless the lives of these children in need. Tears were shed and stories were exchanged as we traveled to ECH and delivered our care packages. 

 Our boys also wanted to serve a group of kids that they could relate to.  They worked hard to purchase entertainment materials for the children at the Missouri Baptist Children’s Home in St. Louis.  After holding a raffle drawing, shoveling snow from driveways, and requesting the support from family members and local community members, our boys were able to replace televisions and purchase Rock Band and other Wii accessories for foster children who had been taken out of unsafe living situations and were living in a full lock down facility waiting for the state to find safe opportunities for them to succeed.  It was truly amazing and inspiring to watch our young men interact and spend time with others.  The selflessness of their service was evident as they helped kids in desperate and cheerless situations forget about their pain and sadness for just a few short hours. More...